Monday, June 1, 2015

Happier than a kid on Christmas #motivationmonday

How would you like to be happy...

Like not just happy like normally happy...

Happier than a kid on Christmas!

Not to be a Debbie-downer but it's easier said than done right? Let's be real for a minute...

Some days you just have to put on the gloves, do your best to knock out the day, and try to leave feeling accomplished.

I put this together one morning before I went into work and didn't post it,  but after a rough start to the week a few weeks ago, I felt like I needed something to reinforce my mindset and start off strong. And it's never too late to reinforce a positive mindset. 

I am going to give you the real life because mine isn't perfect and I don't want you to think it is. I'll be completely honest like I always am, work has been less than pleasant after my competition; projects are ramping up (I am managing 34 right now, and the list gets longer each week). And I really wasn't doing anything I would normally do to manage stress at work and it was eating into me every single day. Not to depress the mood on this awesome Monday, but reflecting back i had plenty of days where I dreaded and even cried not wanting to go in. It happens. It's life. Let's move on for now shall we?

Sometimes, things just aren't as they appeared from the outside looking in (oh wait I never posted that one about my new job dangit!) and every job has flaws. The new one I mean...i better get that one together lol to fill you all in! *Notes to self* And some days, if the going gets rough you have to just keep going. Like any normal person with a crazy 8-5 job like this with no down time; you get a never-ending list of crap to do, that you probably don't enjoy and it can be really freaking hard to make the best of it sometimes. Especially on those days like I had the last few weeks- some are much better given the daily tasks and people you work with and sometimes clients can be a pain. 

Sometimes and no matter what situation, even if you're exactly where you want to be things happen and stress can happen if you get to where I was. it all boils down to one thing...The mind is a tricky place. If you let too much of the 'bad' in - guess what will manifest itself in your life?? A bad mindset, stress and unhappiness. 

No matter what is it or who causes you stress, is that what's going to matter after its all said and done? Probably not. And at the end of the day as much as I don't want to change my mindset or attitude sometimes (funny how we like being miserable?!), it's not fun to stay pissed or or upset or sad and that mindset can be DETRIMENTAL. Say it with me - do not be your own destructionAnd the fact is I need this job cause well, it pays the bills. #realtalk at least until I can make as much money training or go back to school ;) It's amazing how much you realize, a least I have, that don't feel like I'm meant to sit at a damn desk all day. Unless of course I'm working in social psychology research making a killing -- I can dream right?? But that will all come with time. Right now what can we focus on? The present. That is the only thing I can change right. this. second.

Either way, like I just said you have to try to make the best of what you can do, and what you have in this moment, right now. A lot of the time you can't just up and make a dream come true because it takes hard work and lots of time. This is a pain point for someone like me who wants things to happen yesterday. That's another thing- living in the now - that you may hear a lot of. It's a great thing to strive to be better at. And I can at least learn from the hard times now and how you can become, as my husband says - more resilient when things like these come up again. It can all be taken as a learning experience and. Way to make you stronger in your future. Because maybe when you do wake up that one day and make the dream reality, you'll need the lessons and life-skills you learned in your past experiences and all those times that made you the thick-skinned successful person you became. 

So how the hell do you break the stride? How do you get to the point where you're really happy? Honestly if there were a straight answer I would tell you. Trust me! I will say I've gotten really good at forgetting all of the resilient and strengthening methods I used to employ and it's about damn time I "remember!" So here's what I do know...

Let me tell you what I did (and have done lately a hell of a lot more than before) and what I actually forced myself to do on that afternoon that all of this came crashing down. And I have done this same thing many times since to break this trend of grumpy-Rachel that no one wants to be around when it comes up and really for my own personal selfishness - to enforce the positivity and create my happiness. And although my amazing hubby is really amazing, he probably gets tired of that person too. Hell even I get tired of that person! And don't feel bad at all if you have to do this whole 'reset' your attitude thing more than a few days. It is ok I promise! I am having to go at each day with a new mindset and sometimes do mental resets multiple times during the day this week. If you want to read more about that check out this post. I'm telling's still there, I just have to dig it up from time to time. You are the same way! You have it deep down!

That day, I finished up one thing at work (still stayed longer than I wanted) then left. I forced myself to let go and leave everything at my desk, despite my glaring list of things to do that has been getting longer the more projects I get. This in itself keeps me at work so long every day and I promise myself I will get better at this and leave things that can be done tomorrow. I got in the car, turned on my playlist, rolled the windows down and blasted it the whole way home. 

You know what happened-- by the end of my trip home (less than 15 minutes) I was smiling, singing and not thinking about the thing that made me unhappy. Amazing how you feel when you let go of what is dragging you down! (No pun intended)

And most importantly, that weekend (it still persisted the better part of the week), I went back to the source. Back to what I know will get me back on track. Sunday morning I got up and went to the little apt gym even though I missed the yoga class I planned to go to; I went and walked for 20 mins and read an awesome and uplifting book that I found out about a while back then I picked a yoga video and did it myself. Funny how fate guides us to where we need to be. 

Check out her playlist on YouTube!

There are tons of things out there that contribute to stress. Trust me I know what it feels like to always be unhappy or feel like I just am not where I want to be. I am still working through that every week. The fact is that you can't do anything but what you have control over. And you CAN manage your mindset and how  you feel, how you tackle a situation. You are in control of your own happiness. 

And there are a lot of things you can do to make a situation better and at least improve your mindset and attitude to bring less stress to you and more happy feelings more and more often! 

Here are some of my go to things that ALWAYS prove to make stress go away. And like I said, by the end of it I'm back to happier than a kid who just got icecream from the icecream man. 

  • Turn up the tunes! And jam out! No negativity here! 
  • Move far away from anything or anyone spreading negativity
  • Get active or sweat it out - a good sweat is proven to make YOU feel better
  • Smile more
  • Sing out loud
  • Stretch or walk it out 
  • Get some fresh air and take in the beauty beyond your desk
  • Tell yourself to stop the attitude. And say it again- repeat to yourself: "I am not what makes me (insert item/person here) stressed out. I can only do what I can." Then literally move on. 
  • Vocalize what you want to be: "I will not stress" and believe it
  • Take a break and walk away. Get some coffee or talk to a friend. Come back refreshed
  • Literally move past it because you CANNOT change the past
  • Take time for yourself
  • Make a feasible list of things you can get done- I actually had to try 3-5 things to really feel like I made a difference
  • Don't forget you're only one person and only capable of so many things in one day, moment, week or month. Don't force what you cannot do
  • Work on the now and live in the present
Like this that I saw from a friend: 

Whatever makes you happy, do it more. And you'll find yourself a much happier brighter person because of it and maybe one day, like I'm striving to be, you'll be less stressed and more in the now. They say, if you do more of what makes you happy you will be happier! Law of attraction, like I have heard a bit lately. Create what you want and what makes you happy by envisioning yourself as that person; then watch as you transform your life. Think about it. 

So for this week, and maybe just today. One day at a time if you have to. I am not ashamed to say that I am still taking it one day at a time. Over time, you will create habits. Envision what you want and what makes you happy - in your job, at home, wherever that is and create your situation. Not what someone else wants, this has to be for YOU. Take all of those ideas or thoughts that you see that you want and make it a reality. Write it down! I took that tip and made it happen, and I can attest at how much it changes me and my day. Make it a mindset and enforce it when you need to. Make those things you long for a reality and actually start taking the steps to make yourself a happier, healthier person.

Have an amazing Monday and fantastic week!

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